ER for Writers: Some
of the Most Common Mistakes
Writers Make and How to Avoid Them
Jerry Gross
The following list is compiled from my more than forty years of being
a fiction and nonfiction acquisition, developmental and line editor—of
which the
last sixteen years has been spent as a freelance editor/book doctor working
with agented and unagented authors.
MANUSCRIPTS IN GENERAL
Not Delivering a Reader-Friendly Manuscript: Submitting a hard-to-read
manuscript set in ten point type, on dirty paper, with no margins top
or bottom. A manuscript
is an interview with a prospective agent or editor. Would you go to a job interview
in a soiled, wrinkled suit or dress? Of course not, because you know how important
first impressions are in an interview. So be sure your manuscript is as easy
to read as possible: even young editors and agents have tired, old eyes. The
appearance of your manuscript clues the reader into the level of your professionalism
as a writer before a word is read or a page turned. Remember, if your manuscript
looks good,
you look good.
FICTION
Failing To Hook The Reader’s Interest As Quickly As Possible: It
is impossible to overestimate the importance of the first few pages of
your novel in terms
of attracting and holding your reader’s interest. Busy, overworked editors
and agents (and that means all of them!) often decide whether they want to
continue reading your novel on the basis of these early pages. That means creating
a dramatic scene in which a character—preferably your hero or heroine—begins
an important quest, tries to conquer a seemingly insuperable obstacle, or faces
a moment of intense, perhaps life-or-death crisis. Put the reader into the
character’s head as well as describing his or her actions, and make the
reader wonder what happens next.
Waiting too long to set the premise and conflict of the novel and introduce
the protagonist and antagonist: Use description sparingly, establish the setup
of the novel swiftly. Too many unnecessary details delay giving the reader
someone to identify with and to dislike. Get the reader’s emotions and
allegiances established swiftly if you want him or her to keep reading.
Not giving your characters believable motivations, actions and relationships:
It’s always been my belief that a reader will stay with a novel with
some holes in the plotting but will not stay with characters that are not well
motivated, and whose behavior is not credible. When you realize that a novel
basically is a collection of interesting, complex, conflicted people relating
to each other by the decisions they make, or do not make, and that these relationships
really are the “plot” of the story, you see immediately how important
believable, persuasive characters are.
Permitting stilted dialogue to remain a novel: Every character should
speak in his or her own voice, and the dialogue should sound natural
and believable.
To ensure that your dialogue sounds like real people speaking, read it out
loud before committing it to paper. Or, better yet, read it (don’t act
it) into a tape recorder and play it back. You will be amazed how your ear
will pick up tinny dialogue that doesn’t ring true.
-
Don’t overdo it when you
write dialogue: a few words are often enough to establish the class,
ethnicity
or region from which the
speaker comes.
-
When there are only two speakers
in a scene, there’s no need
to keep repeating the person’s name in the flow of dialogue.
If Tom says to Jerry, “How’s
the wife and kids?” there’s no need to write “My wife and
kids are fine. How’s yours?” Jerry replied.
-
Most people use contractions when they speak, so use them in dialogue.
It makes for realistic, brisk conversation.
-
Don’t go into stylistic contortions to avoid simply saying “he
said” or “she said.”
Most other choices make the dialogue sound stilted .
-
Don’t have a character continue speaking for paragraph after
paragraph after paragraph without being interrupted unless he or she
is literally making
a real speech to some group. Listen closely to how people converse and you’ll
notice that dialogue usually runs no more than two or three sentences
before someone interrupts with an answer or a comment of some sort.
-
Don’t rely
on adverbs to enhance or explain your dialogue. If you write, “Get
out of here. You’re fired!” you don’t need to add, “he
said angrily.”
Creating a believable hero or heroine: Your hero or heroine should not
be, cannot be, losers. Modern popular fiction, whether genre or mainstream,
has
as its heroes and heroines people who make life happen; they do not allow life
to happen to them. That means that, after an often grueling quest of some sort
during which they are often momentarily defeated, they triumph over their adversary,
their obstacles---whether a person or an interior failing or a hostile expression
of nature---and accomplish the goal of their quest. In other words, they eventually
take charge of their lives and succeed.
Writing unconvincing sex scenes: Writing a believable sex scene is very
difficult for writers, not because of prudery or embarrassment, but
because too much
attention is given to describing the participants’ sexual acts and not
enough to their thoughts, their psychology, their state of mind. That authority
on sex in all its manifestations, Mae West, said it best when she wrote, “Sex
is emotion in motion.” Remember that where, when, how, and with whom
characters make love should reveal the psychological aspects of their relationship
as well as their sexual tastes and preferences. A sex scene should never be
written just to titillate the reader; it should always be there to enhance
our understanding of the characters and to advance the story.
Not knowing how to plot the novel to sustain the pace, shape, energy
and interest of the story: Don’t overload the opening with too much exposition, a
crowd of characters and a confusing jumble of events and conflicts. The CIA
has a maxim that works well for writers as well as spies: “Information
will be given to you only on a need to know basis.” That means don’t
front-load the story so that all the drama and excitement is at the beginning,
with nothing exciting enough to keep the reader turning the rest of the pages
of the novel. A well-plotted novel should be as smooth an experience as being
with a driver with a steady foot on the gas pedal, who never stops and starts
or lurches or jams on the brakes out of panic.
Not knowing how to create characters: Don’t introduce a character as
though you are reading a resume of his or her life-until-now. Let the reader
learn about a character as we learn about a person we meet in real life: a
little at a time---just as you get to the core of an onion by peeling away
one layer at a time.
Not evoking the individuality of a character: Don’t go for the easy cliché:
the drab librarian, the effeminate male dress designer, the caveman diction
of a truck or taxi driver. Every one of us is an individual, and the good writer
pays attention to how different people walk, talk, sit, gesture. And how class
and financial and educational background influence how we dress, what we read,
where we live, what sports we play or watch, who we date and marry, etc.
Not making changes in time, locale or chronology: Remember to guide the
reader through your story. If the reader’s frustrated or confused, he won’t
finish the novel or buy your next one----if there is a next one.
Not knowing how to write and use flashbacks: Too many writers write extended
flashbacks that are narrated and not dramatized. A flashback is just that – a
return to the past that should be dramatized and brief so that the reader experiences
the scene, and not told about it. If you find that you are using too many flashbacks,
consider starting the story earlier than you have. When using flashbacks make
it clear when you are taking the reader back into time, and when you return
the reader to the time frame of the novel. Too many flashbacks also weaken
the strength of the narrative by frequently diverting the reader from the main
story.
NONFICTION
I’ll just touch upon a few of them here, and devote an entire column
to them in the near future.
Failing to make an outline of the piece you want to write before you
start writing: A loose outline will enable you to develop your main
ideas to the fullest. The consequences of poor planning are abrupt
transitions
that give the piece a jerky,
hard-to-follow quality, a confusing organization that prevents the
reader from seeing the development of concepts and repetitions that
weaken the
power and impact of your thesis.
Failure to tailor your vocabulary to your audience: Many writers, especially
academics, suffer from what I call “the curse of expertise.” They
are so steeped in their field that that they write in the jargon of that field
and not in lay language. This is fine for one’s peers, but alienating
and often incomprehensible to a general audience. But beware that using too
much jargon risks putting even your peer group to sleep. It’s important
to realize that when you begin writing, the vocabulary you use chooses your
audience for you so for a lay audience make your prose as jargon-free and as
informal as possible. This does not in any way mean you should dumb down your
writing. It does mean that you should make complex issues clear to the general
reader.
Failing to research the field: Before you set down to write a proposal
for the nonfiction book you want to write, check what is already
out there on the
shelves. Ask yourself if what you want to say is fresh, new, and a valuable
contribution to the topic about which you plan to write. If you feel you
can’t
make a real contribution to the literature on the subject, then don’t
waste your time and energy. Why? Because unless an agent or an editor feels
that you have something valuable to give the reader---something up-to-date
and informative---you won’t find an agent to represent you or an editor
to publish you.
Obviously there are many, many more mistakes frequently made by writers but
time and space forbid citing and correcting them here and now. Perhaps at
another time, if you express interest in an encore article.
JERRY GROSS is a freelance editor/book
doctor in Croton-on-Hudson, NY. He is the Editor of the standard work
on editing in our country Editors on Editing: What Writers Need To Know About What Editors Do. He can be
reached via E-mail at
jgross@bookdocs.com
Ten
Signs of a Scam Book Doctor
ER for Writers:
Some of the
Most Common Mistakes Writers Make and
How to Avoid Them
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